Steady, trooper. Ben Stokes's team might be heading into the upcoming Ashes Test already 2-0 down, however some remain among supporters is deterred. There is one group perfectly suited for such a situation, a dedicated unit who are arguably the supreme masters of adversity. Is optimism crushed? Do you feel the weight beneath the burden of failed hopes? Well then, enlist with the Barmy Army.
Even now, their early arrivals are gathering in Adelaide, the city where they were established 30 years ago. England's iconic – and by headcount noisiest – tourist followers will be hoping for an anniversary win-against-the-odds, reminiscent of the one they witnessed on that historic tour. Furthermore regardless of the result on the pitch, off it the revelries will be long and loud.
"The on-field action been incredibly disappointing," he admits, "however we're the lucky ones, because we're on holiday. It's perhaps harder for the people at home."
Even a dramatic batting collapse can't shake this group of seasoned campaigners. They've been enduring England's batting collapse since before a new generation started playing. They've seen more spilled chances than star players have international dismissals. Their personal stats as an Ashes supporters' club stands at: played 37, lost 27, won 6. The people who knows how to endure a series sweep, it's the original supporters.
Indeed, for viewers at home, the Barmy Army appear to be all over this series. Host broadcasters at the grounds sometimes appear more focused on the Barmies than on their own fans. TV partners frequently use them as entertainment-focused lead-in to a day's play. Remarkably the athletes on the field acknowledge them, with a fan dressed as a monarch starting a chorus of a patriotic song.
Perhaps that the Barmy Army's dual effect of longevity and omnipresence has now masked quite how stunning their takeover of tourist following has been. Three decades ago a handful travelling fans were brought together in wry self-deprecation at England's poor away record. Now their legacy is so intertwined with the England cricket that their colourful, "unconventional" crowd is practically part of the furniture. They've undoubtedly come a far since the initial chants.
One veteran recalls the eager expectation of the first Test of that 1994-95 tour. With the hosts making a strong start, he led a modest conga in the stands, teasing the locals with a tune about the past. "Local crowds jeered at us, then threw plastic cups – the treatment that we occasionally encounter today," he remembers. "But when we got back our small band of England followers had all taken part."
After defeat, England's tour faced further difficulties. Those backing the team around the country surely was barmy indeed. When it came to the later Tests their crowd had swelled to the hundreds. Those on the field, however, came to value their support at the grounds. When England pulled off a face-saving victory, a star invited a supporter up to the victory celebration to join in the celebrations. This connection persists.
But then, the sheer numbers the Barmy Army can conjure are as valuable to the cricket authorities as they are to overseas venues. For this series alone, their travel packages will bring thousands of paying travellers. A variety of events are scheduled for the significant birthday.
This is, after all, an entity born of fan enthusiasm and business acumen. The logic they mark their founding to a Adelaide game is because that was when they started producing branded clothing. The limited early stock was so instantly popular – and financially rewarding – that it launched a lasting enterprise. From that point, the driving forces have helped turn a group of mates into an major travel company.
That brings its own challenges, notably at a time when sport is trying to lose some of its boisterous image. The Barmy Army's directors are keen to point out that a significant portion of their supporters on tour are now female. With societal shifts, the chants have had to get less offensive, too. "Language that were acceptable 30 years ago you must avoid now, and that's absolutely right," says a representative. "It's not possible to tell someone how to behave individually, but we won't support songs that are insulting."
Could the Barmy Army mellow naturally? The mean age of fans is now nearing middle age – mirroring the founders themselves, who have been content to distance themselves from the daily operation. One founder is experiencing this tour purely as a fan – leaving a fresh team to manage the Barmy Army's online channels. "It's easy to overlook how challenging it used to be to coordinate with each other," he laughs. "Our method was all by word of mouth – 'everyone's going to the pub!'"
As for England's plight, the faint hope of a series victory persists, which is typical of their spirit indeed. And if England are defeated in Adelaide … well, the next tour is always an option.
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